Gambling harm reaches well beyond the person who gambles. The 2019 National Telephone Survey of the Interactive Gambling Study estimated that 6.0% of Australian adults had been harmed by someone else’s gambling, most often a partner, former partner or other family member. The most common harms were feeling angry, distressed or hopeless, more tension and conflict in relationships, less money for spending or savings, and lost sleep.

This page covers how to recognise the problem, how to start the conversation, how to protect your finances and wellbeing, and which services help families directly.

Signs to Look For

Financial signs	Behaviour signs
Money missing from joint accounts	Long periods on the phone, often late at night
Unexplained loans, credit cards or buy-now-pay-later accounts	Irritability or low mood, especially after time online
Bills unpaid despite regular income	Secrecy about phone, email or bank apps
Requests to borrow, with vague reasons	Missed work, study or family events
Valuables sold or pawned	Defensiveness when money is mentioned

One sign alone may have another explanation. A pattern of several, especially the financial ones, is a reason to talk. The nine questions in the signs of problem gambling page can help structure your concerns.

Starting the Conversation

1. Pick the moment. Choose a calm time, not straight after a loss, an argument or drinking.
2. Use specific facts. “A$1,200 left the joint account in three transfers last week” is harder to dismiss than “you gamble too much”.
3. Say how it affects you. “I am worried we will not cover the rent” keeps the focus on consequences.
4. Ask, then listen. Ask how they see it. Expect denial or anger at first; that is common.
5. Offer one concrete step. For example, calling 1800 858 858 together, or looking at BetStop.
6. Do not take on the debt. Paying off gambling debts without a plan often removes the pressure to change.

Gambling Help Online counsellors can help you plan this conversation before you have it.

What You Can and Cannot Do

You can	You cannot
Suggest BetStop and offer to sit with them while they register	Register another adult with BetStop; each person must register themselves
Be nominated as one of up to five BetStop support persons, if they agree	Access their BetStop account or change their exclusion
Help them set deposit limits and bank gambling blocks	Set limits on their accounts without them
Protect your own money and accounts	Control their spending legally unless you have a legal authority to do so
Get counselling for yourself	Force them into treatment

As a BetStop support person, you are contacted at key stages, for example if they try to change their registration. See BetStop.

Protecting Your Finances

• Open an account in your name only for essential bills and savings.
• Remove the person’s access to joint accounts and cards where you can, or ask the bank whether the account can require both holders to approve withdrawals.
• Check your credit report for applications made in your name.
• Do not co-sign loans while gambling is ongoing.
• Keep records of money taken or borrowed.
• Talk to a free financial counsellor through the National Debt Helpline on 1800 007 007.

If you are financially controlled, threatened or unsafe, contact 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732, or 000 in an emergency.

Supporting Change

Stage	What helps
Not ready to change	Keep the conversation open; protect yourself; get support for you
Thinking about it	Share information about help services; offer practical help with BetStop or blocking tools
Taking action	Help remove triggers: delete apps, set up blocking software, add bank gambling blocks
After a lapse	Treat it as part of recovery; encourage contact with their counsellor

Practical tools the person can use are listed on self-exclusion and setting limits.

What Usually Makes Things Worse

Approach	Why it backfires
Repeatedly bailing out debts	Removes the consequence that often prompts change
Covering for them with family or employers	Delays the point at which help is sought
Checking their phone or accounts without agreement	Damages trust and leads to more secrecy
Ultimatums you will not follow through	Lose force each time they are repeated
Blaming yourself	Gambling decisions are theirs; your role is support, not control

Setting clear boundaries about your own money and what you will and will not do is more effective, and a counsellor can help you decide what those boundaries are.

Offshore Casinos

If the person uses offshore online casinos, BetStop will not block them. Help them close each account and request self-exclusion in writing, and install device-level blocking. Background on why these sites sit outside Australian protections: offshore casinos.

Young People

If you are concerned about a teenager, check for simulated gambling games and loot boxes as well as betting apps. Games classified since 22 September 2024 with interactive simulated gambling are rated R 18+. See gambling age and verification. Kids Helpline (1800 55 1800) supports young people aged 5 to 25.

Looking After Yourself

Supporting someone with a gambling problem is stressful. Services for you:

• Gambling Help Online: 1800 858 858, chat and email, 24/7, for family and friends as well as people who gamble.
• Lifeline: 13 11 14, for crisis support.
• Gamblers Anonymous family groups, where available.
• Your GP, who can refer you for counselling.

More services are listed on gambling help services.

This guide is part of our responsible gambling section, which lists every tool and support service in one place.

Frequently Asked Questions

You do not have to manage this alone. Free, confidential support for families is available 24/7 from Gambling Help Online on 1800 858 858. Gambling is for adults 18+ only.